Whit a writ, June went to the fraternity

Whit a writ, June went to the fraternity
In a dress that confirmed her maternity,
            Demanding DNA
            From each guy there that day
To help narrow down the paternity.

There is a GOPer named Sarah

There is a GOPer named Sarah.
When the discourse gets heated, she’s therah.
            Now, she’s on the stump
            In support of the Trump,
Which answers the Democrat’s prayerah.

Another "Lose-A-Letter" limerick

There once was a fellow named Hugh
Who desperately wanted a hug
            From a girl in his class
            A discriminating lass
Who just ran away yelling, “Ug.”

There once was a woman named Seph

There once was a woman named Seph --  
A very demanding head chef.
            She’d scream herself hoarse
            With language so coarse,
He only could hire the deaf.

There once was a fellow named Neal

There once was a fellow named Neal
Who thought oral sex was ideal.
            Just as a receiver
            Since licking of beaver
Simply gave io him no appeal.

There was a woman named Renee

There was a woman named Renee
Who used the treadmill every day.
            Just as soon as she rose
            She laid out the day’s clothes.
On the rails like it was a valet.

There once was a old man named Herman

There once was a old man named Herman.
His friends referred to him as Germ Man
            Since he coughed and he sneezed
            Anywhere that he pleased.
So was covered with miniscule vermin.

A Powerball player named Riddit

A Powerball player named Riddit
Discovered that he indeed “hit it”
            And fell flat on his back
            Dead of a heart attack
Without telling us where he had hid it.

There once was a father named Donne

There once was a father named Donne
Who, once a year, picked up his son
            To take for a ride,
            Full of fatherly pride,
To get his income taxes done.

There once was a young man named Booker

There once was a young man named Booker
Whose mother took him to a hooker.
            She helped him undress her,
            Laid a grand on the dresser,
Then waited in the hall while he took her.

There once was a gangster named Boyle

There once was a gangster named Boyle
Who made the blood of the cops boil.
            He set up as a pimp
            In a high flying blimp,
High above the American soil.

There once was a fellow named Singer

There once was a fellow named Singer
Who lived like a post-modern swinger.
            His neighbors objected
            So Singer erected
A 40-foot tall middle finger.

There once was a fellow named Jason

There once was a fellow named Jason
Who bathed every day in a basin.
            He washed just his face
            And that one other place
Which he soaked ‘til it looked like a raisin.

There once was a waitress named Dawn

There once was a waitress named Dawn
Who worked with almost nothing on.
            She got much better tips
            By showing off her nips,
And $20 got a peek ‘neath her thon’.

As we ponder on 12/31

As we ponder on 12/31
Fretting about the things left undone,
            It should be understood
            That all “New Years” are good
When planning a course on 1/1.