Michigan / Ohio State

Of all the women down at Ohio State
There are none that I would make a bed mate.
The ones that I know
Don’t take care down below,
And let their panties just disintegrate.

All of the women at Michigan
Have too many itches in their britches, man.
To get their pants off
Makes me want to cough
And just makes me hungry for fish again.

There was a young man from Wilkes Barre

There was a young man from Wilkes Barre
On a date in this father’s new carre.
He reached for her tit
But she told him, “Quit!
On a first date, I don’t go that farre.”