There once was a young girl named Joyce
Who liked to hand out with the boyce.
When
she come of age,
She
wrote on her web page,
“I’ll take girls, if I’m given the
choyce.”
Harry the novice bus driver
Was known as a early arriver.
But,
just during sex
With
his soon-to-be ex
Because he’s an orgasm depriver.
There once was a student named Rufus
Who showed his teacher he was
“toofess”.
He
showed her with a grin
Where
his front teeth had been,
For a college senior, he was a doofus.
There once was a woman from Boston
Who like to apply chocolate frostin’
To
her nipples and clit,
More
than just a bit;
Enough for her man to get lost in.
There once was a fellow named Bill
Who lived at the top of a hill.
His
girlfriend, although,
Was
lived too far below.
She might as well been in Brazil.
There once was a girl named Doreen
Who wanted to be a chorine*
She
gave up romancing
To
work on her dancing
Which was not how to get herself seen.
*chorus girl
There was a musician named Simon
Who gave up on melody and rhymin’.
Now
he pounds on a table,
Red
faced and unstable,
And his presence on YouTube is
climbin’.
There once was a fellow named Proctor
Who lost his license as a doctor.
He
was told by his nurse
That
his patients were worse,
So he put on a glove and he socked her.
There once was a woman named Madge
Who wore her grey hair like a badge.
Just
the hair you can see
She
dyed her pubes, you see
‘Cause who wants to see a pale vag.
There once was a woman named Robin
Who sat in her living room sobbin’.
She
felt so bereft
Since
her boyfriend had left
Her alone with her lady parts
throbbin’.
There once was a woman named Polly
Who thought birth control was a folly.
But,
8 children later,
She’s
an appreciator
Of using the dick like a lolly.
There once was a fellow named Daniel
Who looked like a old cocker spaniel.
On
all fours, he walked.
He
barked when he talked.
He had been made from the wrong manual.
There once was a woman named Kirsten
Who knew a secret and was burstin’
To
tell her classmate, Bill,
About
his girlfriend, Jill,
And that he simply would not be the
first in.
There once was a young girl named Jenny
To tweeted to her followers many,
“My
birthday’s come and gone
And
I’m still all alone.
So don’t ask. I didn’t get any."
There once was a fellow named Ernie
A retired corporate attorney
Keeping
his clients
In
legal compliance
For so long just made his brain
churney.
There once was a woman named Jackie
Who knew that her wardrobe was tacky.
She
liked her tube tops,
Daisy
Dukes and flip flops.
She considered it her form of wacky.
There once was a fellow named Muff
Who was not good-looking enough
To
get intertwined
With
any girl but the blind,
Which made dating exceedingly rough.
There once was a fellow named Hanger
Who drank his first Harvey Wallbanger.
Since
he was alone,
He
used his cell phone
To show potential GFs his whanger.
There once was a fellow named Boone;
The first man to have sex on the moon.
With
one-sixth the gravity,
He
sated his depravity
With an inflatable girl he named,
“June”.
There once was a gal named Michelle
Who’s probably going to hell.
He
stabbed her man, Jack,
In
the square of the back
When he asked her, “’Chelle, what’s
that smell?”
There once was a man named McKay
Who worked on his lawn each McDay.
He
spread fertilizer,
Watered
like a geyser,
Now he can’t keep the grass at McBay.
There once was a gal named Darlene
Who looked like her sister, Marlene;
'Cept
Dar had broad hips
While
Mar had full lips.
But neither had boobs like Charlene.
There once was a fellow named Perry
Who everyone thought was a fairy.
Seems
he was very small –
Only
9” tall,
With long graceful wings like a canary.
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