There once was a man named Colbert

There once was a man named Colbert;
Pretending to be full of hot ert.
            When he placed his true self
            On the CBS shelf
He showed there was nothing in thert.

The Supermoon has come and went;

The Supermoon has come and went;
Another fear-causing event.
            I did see a moon,
            That did make me swoon.
Just not the one everyone meant.

There once was a fellow named Jonas

There once was a fellow named Jonas
Who was notorious for his slowness.
            For what it is worth,
            The nurses at his birth
All received a time-and-a-half bonus.

Pity the poor female T. Rex

Pity the poor female T. Rex
Who gets no enjoyment from sex.
            The male’s tiny arms
            Don’t extend to her charms
So her clitical spot he neglects.

There once was a woman named Phyllis

There once was a woman named Phyllis
Who refused to sever the umbilius
            From her son or her daughter
            Which, of course, has brought her
A mob of Moms said to be jealous.

There once was a young girl named Belle

There once was a young girl named Belle
Who thought she was going to hell
            ‘Cause she watched the young boys
            Playing with their own toys
Amazed at how big they would swell.

9/11 demonstrated

9/11 demonstrated
Americans were underrated.
            But the bravery of those
            Who chose to oppose
Fear and terror cannot be debated.

In memoriam to the passengers and crew of Flight 93.