The big blizzard caused D. C. to close

The big blizzard caused D. C. to close
So the wheels of government froze.
            But without concession
            Female pols were in session,
Braving snow while in fashionable clothes.

There once was a young boy named Lucas

There once was a young boy named Lucas
Who said, “The big kids try to juke us.
            But we have desire,
            An unquenchable fire.
To beat us, they’ll just have to nuke us.”

Whit a writ, June went to the fraternity

Whit a writ, June went to the fraternity
In a dress that confirmed her maternity,
            Demanding DNA
            From each guy there that day
To help narrow down the paternity.

There is a GOPer named Sarah

There is a GOPer named Sarah.
When the discourse gets heated, she’s therah.
            Now, she’s on the stump
            In support of the Trump,
Which answers the Democrat’s prayerah.

Another "Lose-A-Letter" limerick

There once was a fellow named Hugh
Who desperately wanted a hug
            From a girl in his class
            A discriminating lass
Who just ran away yelling, “Ug.”

There once was a woman named Seph

There once was a woman named Seph --  
A very demanding head chef.
            She’d scream herself hoarse
            With language so coarse,
He only could hire the deaf.

There once was a fellow named Neal

There once was a fellow named Neal
Who thought oral sex was ideal.
            Just as a receiver
            Since licking of beaver
Simply gave io him no appeal.

There was a woman named Renee

There was a woman named Renee
Who used the treadmill every day.
            Just as soon as she rose
            She laid out the day’s clothes.
On the rails like it was a valet.

There once was a old man named Herman

There once was a old man named Herman.
His friends referred to him as Germ Man
            Since he coughed and he sneezed
            Anywhere that he pleased.
So was covered with miniscule vermin.

A Powerball player named Riddit

A Powerball player named Riddit
Discovered that he indeed “hit it”
            And fell flat on his back
            Dead of a heart attack
Without telling us where he had hid it.

There once was a father named Donne

There once was a father named Donne
Who, once a year, picked up his son
            To take for a ride,
            Full of fatherly pride,
To get his income taxes done.

There once was a young man named Booker

There once was a young man named Booker
Whose mother took him to a hooker.
            She helped him undress her,
            Laid a grand on the dresser,
Then waited in the hall while he took her.

There once was a gangster named Boyle

There once was a gangster named Boyle
Who made the blood of the cops boil.
            He set up as a pimp
            In a high flying blimp,
High above the American soil.

There once was a fellow named Singer

There once was a fellow named Singer
Who lived like a post-modern swinger.
            His neighbors objected
            So Singer erected
A 40-foot tall middle finger.

There once was a fellow named Jason

There once was a fellow named Jason
Who bathed every day in a basin.
            He washed just his face
            And that one other place
Which he soaked ‘til it looked like a raisin.

There once was a waitress named Dawn

There once was a waitress named Dawn
Who worked with almost nothing on.
            She got much better tips
            By showing off her nips,
And $20 got a peek ‘neath her thon’.

As we ponder on 12/31

As we ponder on 12/31
Fretting about the things left undone,
            It should be understood
            That all “New Years” are good
When planning a course on 1/1.