There once was a fellow from Albany

There once was a fellow from Albany
Who while ambulating saw a smalpany.
He asked, “What’s the sound
Of a coin on the ground?”
I just hate it when he gets alzany.

There was a boy from Santa Fe

There was a boy from Santa Fe
Who wanted a pet manta re.
Although far from the ocean
He maintained the motion
That fervent prayer just might granta we.

There once was a fellow from Trenton

There once was a fellow from Trenton
Who asked his wife just what she spenton
Her hair, shoes and clothes,
Which every man knows
Is something he must relenton.

There was a young woman from Concord

There was a young woman from Concord
Who, when driving, never got snocord.
But, if out on a date
With a potential mate,
It’s a certain bet, she got boncord.

There was a gal in Carson City

There was a gal in Carson City
Who wrote a “I love my parson” dity.
The song was so hot –
Believe it or not –
The reviewers called it ‘arson ity”.

There once was a woman from Linclon

There once was a woman from Linclon
Who always passed out after crinclon.
So we replaced her brassiere
With a larger sized pair
To make her think her boobs were shrincoln.

There once was a fellow from Helena

There once was a fellow from Helena
Who while walking about, tripped and felena
Very deep hole
And gave up his soul
Because there was no faithful dog to telena.

A woman from Jefferson City

A woman from Jefferson City
Named Contessa Zerrercon Dity
Tried her new high-tech mop
With the fabric on top
Which he thought of as “Sweffergon gritty

There was a Dragnet fan down in Jackson

There was a Dragnet fan down in Jackson
Who constantly said, “Just the fackson”,
With a monotown voice
As his speaking choice
Without highs or lows or any crackson.

There once was a guy from St. Paul

There once was a guy from St. Paul
Who attempted to partake in pt. baul.
After only one shot
He took off at a trot
And was found only by his ft. caul.

Blog Action Day 2011 -- Food

When most of us head off to bed
We know that we have been well fed.
But many fare never graced
With even the taste
Of Roswqmany and Olive Oil Bread.

If you weren’t hungry today, do something for someone who was.

We say goodbye to Apple’s Steve Jobs

We say goodbye to Apple’s Steve Jobs
Who brought technology to the mobs.
Like Prometheus
He gave fire to us
Revolutionizing our leisure and jobs.

There once was a gourmet in Boston,

There once was a gourmet in Boston,
A town that’s easy to get loston.
Of a man in the Quad,
She asked were to get scrod?
Who said, “You sure don’t need no defroston.”

There once was a kid from Annapolis,

There once was a kid from Annapolis,
A wise-cracker that always would kolis.
His favorite line
(And a favorite of mine)
Was, “What’re you talkin’ ‘bout, Wolis?”

There was a young woman from Augusta

There was a young woman from Augusta
Who was an insurance adjusta.
She denied every claim –
Whether blind, deaf or lame –
Because she was such a mistrusta.

These was a hooker from Baton Rouge

These was a hooker from Baton Rouge
Who never stopped servicing “Scrouge”.
Why’d she get him laid
When the guy never paid?
‘Cause the part that she sat on was houge.

Curt, a young man from Frankfort

Curt, a young man from Frankfor,t
Was arrested for wearing a blank short
The cop said, “With no pants
There could be a chance
That somebody could eyeball your crank, Cort"